Where Babies Come From

Once upon a time there was a frosting company that made delicious, creamy frosting. Once capitalism really made a break out and economic success was anyone's for the taking the frosting company developed the world's first Marketing Department.

After a few corny ads and mild growth the new Marketing Department (uninhibited by 'thinking in the box' as this was an entirely new concept) hatched the evil plan to go into women's brains and make them believe they NEEDED frosting. Right out of the tin. Right now. No matter what.

But how to get women to let them alter their brains? Ahh this, boys and girls, is where the first "Buy this and get this sample product free" campaign began. All you had to do was succumb to the mind altering psychosis of frosting-control and you get a cute little baby. Hitherto frosting-control was known as pregnancy.

Later on frosting was harder to come by because sugar cane was grown primarily in the South and the Civil War had great impact on transportation of goods so said frosting company took a major financial hit and sold it's exclusive rights to the 'brain-control' method to a pickle company, which is where that old stereo type comes from. This was a bad idea though because thanks to said war and proceeding war women started making their own pickles and getting their own babies.

But now we are in an economic recovery and the original frosting company that got into industrial production for a while is now run by a board that is taking the company back in it's original direction and so long story short, I am really, really, needing some frosting right now.

Frugal Friday Food And Fun

So I realized my obsession isn't gardening necessarily, but the efficiency and cheapness of it all. All together it is homesteading, stockpiling, couponing, making your own clothes, a drive for sufficiency in living within our means.

So Frugal adventures as of late:

Regrowing celery from the store. I read about it in disbelief, started to believe a little with furthur reading and ran to the fridge to cut up the celery I had in there to start the experiment. It's working! My little celery heart has sprouted. How cool is that? If I grow that into just one more head of celery then I've saved over $1, and every dollar matters.

Couponing. Whoa. This is a big hairy complicated world. But I like it. It seems that you have to start where there are rewards, find an item with high rewards points and a coupon and start there, then you roll over those points and start saving. That would be my biggest piece of advice for anyone starting, start with one store, one or two items. If you make a big ol' strategy you may come out with $40 in gift cards and points but you spent $100 of things you weren't planning on buying to get there. The idea is to spend very little on those things you don't need right now.

Home Sauna. This just means I am from Texas and no 100 degree days in California are going to scare me. We do NOT use the air conditioner, nor will we start. We have a little kiddie pool so when the afternoon is unbearable we dip in that then lay in the hammock, California has a breeze. I can do 100 degrees with a breeze. Plus it doesn't stay 100. So our electric bills have all been under $60. In California. You can't buy a coke here for under $60

The Best Things In Life - Morning Sickness Edition

An ongoing feature of 5 of the best things in life.

These are what I found were my greatest comforts when in the worst throes of Morning Sickness

1. Gum- Something in your mouth counteracting that nasty metallic taste and helping with the too much saliva thing (what is that thing? I don't know but it make you want to puke and it's probably triggered by wanting to puke)

2. Showers- sometimes you're too weak and sick but when you muster up the gusto to take a shower, ahh, that's the good stuff. When you're sick you're gross, getting all clean, the water feels good and the best thing: you can spit anywhere. The too much saliva thing makes you want to spit all the time and sometimes you're on the couch weighing your options like "Get up and spit, stay here and suffer" in the shower you don't need to grab a tissue or head to the sink, you can just spit right there. Sorry, I know this is gross but I really wanted to share how great some things can be.

3. Alcohol. Sweet relief. Not drinking of course, that would be awesome if pregnancy and drinking went together but I'm pretty sure if you're already puky, booze doesn't help. Rubbing alcohol my friend. Someone told me to sniff it and it kind of works. Probably bad for you but wipe up a mess with a little witch hazel and you're happy for 0.168 seconds.

4. Here we go,  the good stuff. Pine Sol. I bought the blue one. I CLEAN EVERYTHING. Everything in the world smells bad except for Blue Pine Sol and Rubbing Alcohol. I took every single item out of my fridge and freezer, wiped down said fridge and freezer with Blue Pine Sol, wiped down every item that went back inside fridge and freezer with Pine Sol, then mopped with it. It is un-stink. The killer of evil. Maybe I'll put some in a Scentsy pot.....

5. This one is fantastic. The "Morning Sickness Button" on Pinterest. Haven't seen it? Eh, well, it hasn't been invented yet.YET. But if the coders in Pinland are cool they will make one. What does it do? It lets your sick self waste time, distracted from the pain in life, strolling on Pinterest with all the food pictures OMITTED. I don't care if you found a way to make a Paleo Chocolate Chip Oreo Casserole for under $5 with only 150 calories, or if it's something your great grandma taught you, IT MAKES ME WANT TO DIE when I see it. So if Pinterest could just get on that, yeah, that would be great.

What was your comfort in the black death plague known as morning sickness?

Photo Credit: 1, 2, 3, 4

Sucker Punched!

Ok wise webbers, you gotta help me out here: in the pictures of my 'garden' I have one, big, happy tomato plant. Well, it's obviously indeterminite and as I have been told I dutifully pinched off all the suckers as it grew, except one that got away and became to big to prune, well....

ONLY THE SUCKER AND HEAD HAVE FLOWERS.

I thought it was supposed to be the other way around? You pinch suckers because they are "all leaf and no fruit". Well, now I have a ton of branches and leaves, and only 2 points with flowers.

What's up with that?!

Transparency And Confessions

So it's like this.

Transparency: I really am a beginner. I am here to learn from and with you all, but I feel kinda shammy having a garden blog and one sad little garden.


See my plants:

Yellow Lookin' Basil

 One very small, stunted tomato :(

Happy (I hope) Tomato

Lettuce. Fixin to bolt. Which is fine at this time in the season, but it was kinda bitter???

Crook neck. He's ok. Pretty much happy I think, I went to town on fertilizer on this guy cos he was yellow.

*BUT* When we ate some of the fruit, before, it was kinda woody. Do I need to water more?

As you can see my garden is all in containers, we are just renting and have only been living in our current state (Californ-I-A) for a couple months so we are definitely not permanent here and that leads me to the confession...

Confession: I wanna homestead!! Waaaa. Maybe not so shocking on a gardening blog, but I want to remain in my pencil skirts, heels and lipstick. I want to always be close to a city. I love girls nights out and malls. This inner homesteading desire really is kind of a secret inner burning. 

There. Now you know. 

Father's Day Outdoor Edition 2014

Happy Father's Day, Fathers! 

I've compiled a list of what Father's day would look like in my house. Enjoy!

1. A Hammock - of course. Garden and outdoors is all about relaxing and enjoying it for the father in my house.

2. Paint - why would he want paint? I'm thinking this gift is from the kids, they can paint neat pieces of wood or rocks with messages about how great Dad is. I know someone who would *love* this.

3. Another from-the-kids gift, a Birdhouse Kit to put together with the littles. Nothing like outdoor beauty and a lesson/quality time for Father's day memories. (Maybe even use those paints when it's done?)

4. Paper Lantern Lights. Like I said, Dad at my house likes to be outside, feet up and relaxing. Anything to make his outdoor experience more ambiance-ish will be appreciated. 

Social Bliss Style Box Review - May Box

Ok. It's a little late, but that's because my heavy heart didn't want to re-live the tragic disappointment I felt when I opened the box.

Real quick- what I liked about the boxes (reviewing past boxes online) was that each came with a purse that was the high-value item with some cute lil stuff sprinkled in. I DO NOT care for skin or hair care, I have what I specifically purchased for my skin at a high cost and I'm not gonna just go around slappin' every lotion, oil and cleanser on the ol' money-maker. This is why I canceled my Ipsy subscription. The value is there on paper, but if you're not in the market for that thing the value is negative.

Ex: a glass of water to a fish at the bottom of the ocean vs some dude in a desert.

SO when I opened el boxo del crap this is what I found:


Photo from SocialBliss.com

The purse was a coin purse. Oh. My Gosh. Hold me back, I'm so excited. -_-

The high value item was flippin skin care.

Then it had eyelash curlers (hi, I'm a female, I already own a set. Or two) a hair band, face wipes and a lufa foot scrubby bathroom set thing. (Hi, I'm a female, I already own a set, or two)

So "value" it puts itself at over $100 costing you only $40 (roughly) but the value to me is only what I would pay for on my own. So basically I paid $40 for some face wipes.

Canceled my scrip. I think I'm over boxes unless they are gifts to me. Speaking of gifts, if you are my friend or family member, don't be surprised to get a lufa for Christmas.