Where Babies Come From

Once upon a time there was a frosting company that made delicious, creamy frosting. Once capitalism really made a break out and economic success was anyone's for the taking the frosting company developed the world's first Marketing Department.

After a few corny ads and mild growth the new Marketing Department (uninhibited by 'thinking in the box' as this was an entirely new concept) hatched the evil plan to go into women's brains and make them believe they NEEDED frosting. Right out of the tin. Right now. No matter what.

But how to get women to let them alter their brains? Ahh this, boys and girls, is where the first "Buy this and get this sample product free" campaign began. All you had to do was succumb to the mind altering psychosis of frosting-control and you get a cute little baby. Hitherto frosting-control was known as pregnancy.

Later on frosting was harder to come by because sugar cane was grown primarily in the South and the Civil War had great impact on transportation of goods so said frosting company took a major financial hit and sold it's exclusive rights to the 'brain-control' method to a pickle company, which is where that old stereo type comes from. This was a bad idea though because thanks to said war and proceeding war women started making their own pickles and getting their own babies.

But now we are in an economic recovery and the original frosting company that got into industrial production for a while is now run by a board that is taking the company back in it's original direction and so long story short, I am really, really, needing some frosting right now.

Frugal Friday Food And Fun

So I realized my obsession isn't gardening necessarily, but the efficiency and cheapness of it all. All together it is homesteading, stockpiling, couponing, making your own clothes, a drive for sufficiency in living within our means.

So Frugal adventures as of late:

Regrowing celery from the store. I read about it in disbelief, started to believe a little with furthur reading and ran to the fridge to cut up the celery I had in there to start the experiment. It's working! My little celery heart has sprouted. How cool is that? If I grow that into just one more head of celery then I've saved over $1, and every dollar matters.

Couponing. Whoa. This is a big hairy complicated world. But I like it. It seems that you have to start where there are rewards, find an item with high rewards points and a coupon and start there, then you roll over those points and start saving. That would be my biggest piece of advice for anyone starting, start with one store, one or two items. If you make a big ol' strategy you may come out with $40 in gift cards and points but you spent $100 of things you weren't planning on buying to get there. The idea is to spend very little on those things you don't need right now.

Home Sauna. This just means I am from Texas and no 100 degree days in California are going to scare me. We do NOT use the air conditioner, nor will we start. We have a little kiddie pool so when the afternoon is unbearable we dip in that then lay in the hammock, California has a breeze. I can do 100 degrees with a breeze. Plus it doesn't stay 100. So our electric bills have all been under $60. In California. You can't buy a coke here for under $60

The Best Things In Life - Morning Sickness Edition

An ongoing feature of 5 of the best things in life.

These are what I found were my greatest comforts when in the worst throes of Morning Sickness

1. Gum- Something in your mouth counteracting that nasty metallic taste and helping with the too much saliva thing (what is that thing? I don't know but it make you want to puke and it's probably triggered by wanting to puke)

2. Showers- sometimes you're too weak and sick but when you muster up the gusto to take a shower, ahh, that's the good stuff. When you're sick you're gross, getting all clean, the water feels good and the best thing: you can spit anywhere. The too much saliva thing makes you want to spit all the time and sometimes you're on the couch weighing your options like "Get up and spit, stay here and suffer" in the shower you don't need to grab a tissue or head to the sink, you can just spit right there. Sorry, I know this is gross but I really wanted to share how great some things can be.

3. Alcohol. Sweet relief. Not drinking of course, that would be awesome if pregnancy and drinking went together but I'm pretty sure if you're already puky, booze doesn't help. Rubbing alcohol my friend. Someone told me to sniff it and it kind of works. Probably bad for you but wipe up a mess with a little witch hazel and you're happy for 0.168 seconds.

4. Here we go,  the good stuff. Pine Sol. I bought the blue one. I CLEAN EVERYTHING. Everything in the world smells bad except for Blue Pine Sol and Rubbing Alcohol. I took every single item out of my fridge and freezer, wiped down said fridge and freezer with Blue Pine Sol, wiped down every item that went back inside fridge and freezer with Pine Sol, then mopped with it. It is un-stink. The killer of evil. Maybe I'll put some in a Scentsy pot.....

5. This one is fantastic. The "Morning Sickness Button" on Pinterest. Haven't seen it? Eh, well, it hasn't been invented yet.YET. But if the coders in Pinland are cool they will make one. What does it do? It lets your sick self waste time, distracted from the pain in life, strolling on Pinterest with all the food pictures OMITTED. I don't care if you found a way to make a Paleo Chocolate Chip Oreo Casserole for under $5 with only 150 calories, or if it's something your great grandma taught you, IT MAKES ME WANT TO DIE when I see it. So if Pinterest could just get on that, yeah, that would be great.

What was your comfort in the black death plague known as morning sickness?

Photo Credit: 1, 2, 3, 4

Sucker Punched!

Ok wise webbers, you gotta help me out here: in the pictures of my 'garden' I have one, big, happy tomato plant. Well, it's obviously indeterminite and as I have been told I dutifully pinched off all the suckers as it grew, except one that got away and became to big to prune, well....

ONLY THE SUCKER AND HEAD HAVE FLOWERS.

I thought it was supposed to be the other way around? You pinch suckers because they are "all leaf and no fruit". Well, now I have a ton of branches and leaves, and only 2 points with flowers.

What's up with that?!

Transparency And Confessions

So it's like this.

Transparency: I really am a beginner. I am here to learn from and with you all, but I feel kinda shammy having a garden blog and one sad little garden.


See my plants:

Yellow Lookin' Basil

 One very small, stunted tomato :(

Happy (I hope) Tomato

Lettuce. Fixin to bolt. Which is fine at this time in the season, but it was kinda bitter???

Crook neck. He's ok. Pretty much happy I think, I went to town on fertilizer on this guy cos he was yellow.

*BUT* When we ate some of the fruit, before, it was kinda woody. Do I need to water more?

As you can see my garden is all in containers, we are just renting and have only been living in our current state (Californ-I-A) for a couple months so we are definitely not permanent here and that leads me to the confession...

Confession: I wanna homestead!! Waaaa. Maybe not so shocking on a gardening blog, but I want to remain in my pencil skirts, heels and lipstick. I want to always be close to a city. I love girls nights out and malls. This inner homesteading desire really is kind of a secret inner burning. 

There. Now you know. 

Father's Day Outdoor Edition 2014

Happy Father's Day, Fathers! 

I've compiled a list of what Father's day would look like in my house. Enjoy!

1. A Hammock - of course. Garden and outdoors is all about relaxing and enjoying it for the father in my house.

2. Paint - why would he want paint? I'm thinking this gift is from the kids, they can paint neat pieces of wood or rocks with messages about how great Dad is. I know someone who would *love* this.

3. Another from-the-kids gift, a Birdhouse Kit to put together with the littles. Nothing like outdoor beauty and a lesson/quality time for Father's day memories. (Maybe even use those paints when it's done?)

4. Paper Lantern Lights. Like I said, Dad at my house likes to be outside, feet up and relaxing. Anything to make his outdoor experience more ambiance-ish will be appreciated. 

Social Bliss Style Box Review - May Box

Ok. It's a little late, but that's because my heavy heart didn't want to re-live the tragic disappointment I felt when I opened the box.

Real quick- what I liked about the boxes (reviewing past boxes online) was that each came with a purse that was the high-value item with some cute lil stuff sprinkled in. I DO NOT care for skin or hair care, I have what I specifically purchased for my skin at a high cost and I'm not gonna just go around slappin' every lotion, oil and cleanser on the ol' money-maker. This is why I canceled my Ipsy subscription. The value is there on paper, but if you're not in the market for that thing the value is negative.

Ex: a glass of water to a fish at the bottom of the ocean vs some dude in a desert.

SO when I opened el boxo del crap this is what I found:


Photo from SocialBliss.com

The purse was a coin purse. Oh. My Gosh. Hold me back, I'm so excited. -_-

The high value item was flippin skin care.

Then it had eyelash curlers (hi, I'm a female, I already own a set. Or two) a hair band, face wipes and a lufa foot scrubby bathroom set thing. (Hi, I'm a female, I already own a set, or two)

So "value" it puts itself at over $100 costing you only $40 (roughly) but the value to me is only what I would pay for on my own. So basically I paid $40 for some face wipes.

Canceled my scrip. I think I'm over boxes unless they are gifts to me. Speaking of gifts, if you are my friend or family member, don't be surprised to get a lufa for Christmas.

My Style Uniform and How I got there.

So have you heard about "Personal Style Uniforms"?

I'm kind of obsessed. Think of Simon Cowell, he is always in a tee shirt, usually white, that's his thing and a bad example is Steve Jobs in those hideous mock-necks. A better example is Andrea Jung, CEO of Avon, she's always in a sheath dress, usually with pearls.


I've loved the idea of having your-look. It saves time money and bad gifts. If you have your thing that's you, people will more likely gravitate towards gifts that "Just look so YOU!" than "I thought you'd look good in this" and it's purple tweed or something.

Hindrances I've found to taking the mono-look plunge:

• Deciding if marrying ONE color is something I'm ready to commit to
• Obsessing over "yeah, I could do this.... oh no, that doesn't work for weddings, funerals etc"
• I like sweaters. They don't work in summer
• WHICH look is ME???
• etc.

So I'm happy to say, I'm pretty sure I've found my answer. (OHMYGOODNESS!) Yes, it is true. Maybe this will help you as I can't be the only uniform/capsule/solve-all-my-problems wardrobe obsesser. And now that I'm pregnant I need to make wise decisions and buy a bunch of clothes. Grumble. Nothing fits. nothing nothing nothing

The first step in finding my uniform was giving myself permission to expand the boundaries a little. Simon Cowel always wears a t shirt. I am not a music producer, I have different levels of event in life. Meaning: I may just clean house and garden one day, I may go shopping another, at least once a week there is church and several times a year there are more-special church holidays. Of course there are weddings, funerals, dates and baseball games. I can't wear a white t shirt to all of those. 

Wait... white t shirt. I've never been a t shirt person, but sometimes they look so good on folks....

And it works so many ways! (If you haven't seen this picture before then Hi, let me welcome you to the internet :)  )  This is Audrey's blog. You should go to her site and read her remix stuff. It's good stuff. 

I learned a long time ago I love patterned bottoms. Mostly skirts. You can go into a thrift store or off-the rack sales place and buy a skirt for super cheap and because it's a skirt the size is forgiving, like if it's a size or 2 too big but it's a short skirt, it sits on your hips and is a cute knee-length skirt (Some of my favs are exactly that) or you can get a skirt altered easier than anything. Especially A-lines which are my super favs.

Ok, so I love colorful patterned bottoms and big necklaces. Boom. White t shirts. I will add them, learn to love them. Now on this note, I will not rest until I find the right white t. I do not like cotton. I don't know why. It has to be a major blend.

White tees and A-line skirts, with permission to have jackets on top of that, or mix it up with a maxi skirt, printed pants etc. 

Great Start! I can do a million things with that. So, now that I've spelled out that I really love A-lines I can go ahead and just throw in Fit and Flare dresses for my 'look' too. Sometimes it won't be a t shirt and skirt, it will be a dress. Fine by me. A little nicer.

Isn't that pretty? Oh I love these kinds of dresses. Since I already gave myself 'permission' to have as many jackets and cardigans as I damn well please I can accessorize with what I'll already have. Plus my necklace collection. Aaaaannnndd someday I'll learn to sew. This seems like the kind of thing I could sew. Right?

And then came color, again at Audrey's blog she talked about choosing your neutrals- I chose white and grey, with off-white being acceptable. Others will work their way in, but my intentionals are white and grey. I love white on white. I want to get a whole bunch of white stuff so I can wear all white. And then soon I'll have a baby and probably curse the white on white.....

And she demonstrated the color wheel and it's power:

Original picture from: http://www.academichic.com/2009/02/02/fashion-101-how-to-combine-colors/

In this pic she talked about color groups (in the color wheel colors equal spaces out 'go' together, like green is across from red and blue yellow and red are triangularly spaced apart). Thus I realized I wear a lot of teal. Looking at the wheel teal is across from coral/orange. Combine the surrounding colors and I have green, teal, navy and orange, coral, peach, red orange. What do you know? These colors all work for me!

I've always known I like green and blue but whenever I buy something that's really blue it just doesn't seem right and I never wear it. Navy stuff I just happen to end up with but wear the shirt out of it. Orange too. Especially orange with navy and what do you know, they fit the bill for the color wheel. So now I have a color scheme that doesn't make me feel restricted. I don't like purple and I look dead in yellow, but my blue and orange purchases will be more educated.
 My Polyvore Set
Seems kind of repetitious? That's the point! My uniform!

Candy Man

 "Music is my mistress," Duke Ellington said, and with equal conviction I say "Sugar is my Sancho". 

That sneaky bastard has found a way into my life when I need him the least. I'm trying to develop a baby here, trying to be a good wife. But he finds his way back in.

 Every day I say to myself, it's over. We're through. He's in my thoughts when I wake up, often has been in my thoughts and dreams throughout the night. I move through my day telling myself it's day one of "recovery". We are over. 

 Then, he calls. Today for example, on an honest errand at the mall, how did he even find me? "Hey, I'm at the Sweet Shack, meet me there for a minute. Your husband's not around, we can just talk." The next thing I know I'm walking around Nordsrtom's sneaking Sweet Tarts out of my bag into my mouth jealously guarding my bag full of lollipops and mega dum-dums. Damn you, Sugar. 

 As I recover (that means pass out on the couch from a sugar crash) I sluggishly remember all the nastiness that comes with sugar consumption, besides fat, the headaches and for me anxiety,  nausea and even mild depression. Why can't I remember that before I candy myself into sickness. I'll tell you why, it's because sugar- with a voice much like Antonio Banderas- says, "This time will be different, Bunny, I won't hurt you. Look how sweet, imagine ze flavor...."

 And just like an affair I'm hiding all evidence from my husband before he gets home. Oh shame. Oh huge box of cereal I just bought. Oh fruit roll-ups.

Oh Pregnancy! I never liked candy before! 

Review of Stephen King and Bing via text.

True life texts between me and one of my fav's peoples. My fav to text for sure. Shows what I really think. Enjoy!

Life List May 2014

Life List  May 2014

Upcoming:

• Mother's Day 11th
• Memorial Day 26th
• Wedding! 25th

To Do's:

• Plan wedding trip
• Write toast!
• Send mom's day cards and gifts 

Baby Do's:

• Read books 
• Registries

Excited for:

• My First Mother's day! (someone already sent me a gift!)
• My first Social Bliss Style Box! Whoo! I need a purse so bad and they always come with one
• The wedding! Not mine, I'm a bridesmaid. 
• Making a special trip to the Monterey Bay Aquarium

photo credit: <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/billy_wilson/4626461217/">Billy Wilson Photography</a> via <a href="http://photopin.com">photopin</a> <a href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/2.0/">cc</a>

On Turning 30

I tried to hide, I tried to lie, I finally accepted it was coming, and that I would probably die.

The last night of my 29th year found me moping, sad, dreading. Dreams full of liquor stores that don't ask ID and anti aging creams made from youthful virgins. 

So in the morning when I woke on the dawn of my 30s, I was.... well, fine. Happy. Relieved. I'm 30. Thank God that 20s mess is over.

 Now I'm here, there's no stopping it or dreading it and hey, I'm early thirties. For so long I've been LATE TWENTIES. Now I"m back in 'early camp'. Nice. I'm a baby. 

I instantly felt more confident. My life is no longer "an open road of possibilities, wondering what path I will take and where life will lead me". Now I kind of know. I've made a lot of those decisions, gone down paths. I'm at the point of living my life rather than thinking about it how it should go. Kinda like, I went to the nursery, chose the seeds and bulbs and starters, that's all done, no longer fussing over 'should I buy a banana tree or a tomato plant?' I've already chosen. I've already planted. Time to watch 'em grow.

They say you mature a lot and learn yourself when you turn 30. I did *not think* that literally happened in the midnight hours between 29 and 30.

Embrace the 30. I'm so cool with it, I"m not even scared of 40 anymore.

You? What was your BIG NUMBER? How do you feel about it?

photo credit: <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/zenat_el3ain/3621625591/">Aih.</a> via <a href="http://photopin.com">photopin</a> <a href="http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/">cc</a>

Kimonos and pregnancy

Good morning and hi. I am just getting my head cleared. Here's the thing about pregnancy, I feel like someone is inside me, but they are poisonous to the rest of me.I am fatter and super super bloated. I actually had a dream last night that I was wearing some old world Japanese ceremonial robe and begging my friend if I could wear it to her wedding because it was the only thing I had that would fit. And I'm not even showing yet! Or if I am I can't tell, I've developed an insulation layer and with the bloating, my true shape is anyone's guess.

Never thought I'd be the person all negative and complainy about pregnancy. I mean, if I was ever going to be pregnant that meant I was damn sure I wanted to be and thus I was going to appreciate all the little things, and I was going to take care of myself, unlike those people so I probably wouldn't even feel bad.

meh. *spits on the ground* For once in my life I feel out of control of how I am. Deep deep -deeeep deep down- I noticed that I kinda felt like you got what you really wanted. I'm naturally of average height, have an eye color I'm satisfied with, average size feet. Body type that's ok, I have to stay on top of it but I'm naturally small. As a kid in school we had a boy classmate who was so small, always very short and just small and I remember catching myself saying "why didn't he want to be bigger bad enough?" I knew it was stupid, but some part of me had this "If you want it bad enough...." To back this theory up I SWEAR -no one remembers this- I had blue eyes like my dad but wanted green eyes like my mom. BAD. It was pretty big on my mind. I was about 5 then and made a mental note to look into colored contacts, and if they were not invented yet, then to invent them. Eventually, my eyes turned green. Not as green as my moms, they still look blue sometimes, but a definite switch. *So* you can't blame my forming mind for coming and holding to that conclusion. But now pregnancy has shown me it doesn't matter what you think you will have, expect or what you want, no matter how bad you want it, thus be grateful for all that stuff you like about yourself, you didn't get it by will power and you can't control hardly anything.